I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
