how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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