Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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