Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
