is your mom at the bar?
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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