I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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