these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
