dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize
