she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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