I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize