i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
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