She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
