Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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