Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
