What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
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