Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
