happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
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