so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
