Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
