It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize
