Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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