All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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