It's like God shit irony all over that family
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Randomize
