Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
they need to just BURY HIM!
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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