NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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