And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize