just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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