I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
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I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
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I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.