That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
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