I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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