I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
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i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
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Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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