its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
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