I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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