i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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