I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Vodka?
Forever.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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