I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
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