Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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