Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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