If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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