the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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