Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
