You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
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