what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Randomize
