If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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