I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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