I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
