she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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