We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
