were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
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