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• (641): View more from Iowa

  Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?

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• (831): View more from California

  i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.

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• (862): View more from New Jersey

  he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (620): View more from Kansas

  Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.

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• (518): View more from New York

  I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.

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• (586): View more from Michigan

  LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT

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• (218): View more from Minnesota

  Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

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• (909): View more from California

  We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.

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• (830): View more from Texas

  Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."

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• (206): View more from Washington

  steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?

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