I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I am one with the molecules
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
